


Gasoline

by Siesiewrites



Series: Songs of Angst [2]
Category: Thomas Sander - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Hasley - Freeform, Patton isn't doing well, Self Harm, Song Lyrics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-27
Updated: 2018-08-27
Packaged: 2019-07-03 03:14:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15810174
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Siesiewrites/pseuds/Siesiewrites
Summary: Patton hasn't been doing well since Virgil was taken. Then his 'other' starts to talk to him.Look! Even more angst!





	Gasoline

**Author's Note:**

> Song used: Gasoline by Hasley
> 
> Warnings: self harm, swearing (in the lyrics), lots of angst

'Are you insane like me?'

Patton sat completely still. His eyes staring blankly at the wall.

'Been in pain like me?'

He ignored the sides asleep, their heads resting on his lap, on ether side of him. He couldn't sleep, he wouldn't sleep.

'Bought a hundred dollar bottle of champagne like me?  
Just to pour that motherfucker down the drain like me?  
Would you use your water bill to dry the stain like me?'

When he looked in the mirror he could see the scars. He had always wondered how why the others couldn't see, but now the just served as a reminder.

'Are you high enough without the Mary Jane like me?'

Today the one that came was a line from the corner of his mouth to his ear. As if to create a smile.

'Do you tear yourself apart to entertain like me?'

Patton took the knife he hid behind his hygiene products in the mirror. He put the edge against the corner of his mouth.

'Do the people whisper 'bout you on the train like me?  
Saying that you shouldn't waste your pretty face like me?'

A dull tingling feeling went through his face. He examined the new scar that had formed as soon as he took the knife away from his face. Closing before he could even bleed.

'And all the people say  
You can't wake up, this is not a dream'

Nobody would go to their rooms, choosing to instead stay in the living room. For Patton there was to many memories. Roman didn't dare incase he tried to dream up a different situation, one where his family was all there and no one could separate them. Logan would be alone, not something he wanted to go through again.

'You're part of a machine, you are not a human being  
With your face all made up, living on a screen'

Patton pulled on Virgil's jacket, hoping that it would stop the cold shivers that ran through him every time he looked at the others. Their own scars red against their skin.

'Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline'

Patton didn't eat. He didn't have to. His 'other' kept him fed just fine.

'I think there's a flaw in my code'

Patton didn't want to see his 'other', but almost every time he looked in the mirror all he saw was him. His sunken cheeks, his eyeshadow running down his face from his never ending crying, and his scars. They matched Pattons, down to the bruises across his throat.

'These voices won't leave me alone  
Well my heart is gold and my hands are cold'

His thought are what Patton hated most about his 'other'. He could hear them all the time, all of them suicidal.

'Are you deranged like me?  
Are you strange like me?'

That is until the day after Virgil was taken.

'Lighting matches just to swallow up the flame like me?  
Do you call yourself a fucking hurricane like me?  
Pointing fingers 'cause you'll never take the blame like me?,

Patton didn't want to believe the voice was talking to him. But it kept repeating. The same question over and over again.

'And all the people say  
You can't wake up, this is not a dream  
You're part of a machine, you are not a human being  
With your face all made up, living on a screen  
Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline'

'Why do you hurt me?'

'I think there's a flaw in my code  
These voices won't leave me alone  
Well my heart is gold and my hands are cold'

**Author's Note:**

> Looks like this is going to be an angsty journey!
> 
> What song should I use in future chapters?
> 
> Ideas for future chapters (I'm not as creative as you might think)?


End file.
